Turn Your Eyes
I sit here today on the morning of March 3rd, where here in Kentucky we are having a "weather aware day" as the weatherman says. Now I personally cannot stand these sorts of days. I don't really think anyone truly enjoys days when the weather could turn severe aside from maybe some very outgoing storm chasers. But whilst I don't think anyone enjoys this weather, I think I take it to an extreme. I get almost sick with it. From the moment yesterday evening, we start really looking at the weather and realizing that it could be potentially very dangerous, I've been very uneasy. My stomach has been so upset and I feel like I could vomit at any moment and I'm in a battle with my mind to not think the worst will happen. You're probably thinking, wow this woman sounds absolutely exhausting. Well, I am exhausting, that much is true, but I also lived through a tornado, I suppose two really, and when the weather turns severe, I turn a bit wild. Yesterday was actually the anniversary of the big tornado that ripped through and destroyed my hometown in Eastern Kentucky. Even on the weather reports last night, the meteorologist brought up the terrible tornado that happened 11 years ago. Nothing about the tornado made sense, I'd always grown up thinking being in between so many hills meant that we would be kept safe from a tornado but back in 2012 we had two just days apart. It was one of those "that will never happen to me" moments. I also lived through another one of those moments in 2010 when my father was killed in a motorcycle accident. No one ever thinks that will happen to them, in fact before my father's accident, a fellow teammate I played softball with lost her father to an accident and I just remember thinking, oh I couldn't survive it if that was me. But alas, here I am, alive and well despite these "that will never happen to me" moments I've experienced in my still young life. So as one can probably see, I generally do think that those moments you think won't happen will happen. And I think that because they have happened!
But something ringing true in my head is the trustworthiness of my God. My mind is directed to Him via the song "Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus", specifically a version done by the Christian band Third Day. I don't even know how long it's been since I've heard this song. Yet, in my time of great fear, Mac Powell's voice echoes in my head, giving me the words that remind me what to do when I'm afraid which just so happen to line up with the scripture I'm memorizing this week:
"We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who iniates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God's throne." - Hebrews 12:
As I pick back up on writing this post, it's the week following the big storm. I'm thankful to say we survived with no damage really (aside from the loss of our pool cover bag and a storage bin). It was such a strange day all day long. When the storms hit us, nothing happened. The squall line had broken up significantly and so the tornadic risk was lowered. So during that essential part of the day, nearly nothing happened. When we popped back on the news, they were talking about the real risk coming at the tail end of the storms with the high wind. Now, I personally cannot ever remember having winds like that in my life aside from when we had the tornado years ago so I didn't really know what to expect. I foolishly thought if we got passed the tornado possibilities that there couldn't possibly be anything of any harm, boy was I wrong.
After the initial storm passed, the wind began to pick up some. At one point a gust came which made my sister, my step-daughter and I pause in amazement. I began cooking dinner thinking that it was all passed us and sure there would be some wind but nothing serious. Midway through cooking, our lights went off. They went back and forth three or four times before finally shutting off for good around 5:15 pm. Isn't it always funny how much you don't realize you need something until it's gone? During the around 6 hours we were without electricity (we were extremely blessed to get our power back around 11:15 pm that night), it was made very obvious we were not prepared to be without power. We had three flashlights in the house. One of those having corroded batteries and another only a very small flashlight my toddler received as a Christmas gift. We also had some portable chargers which absolutely weren't charged so as you can tell we were well prepared to face an uncertain amount of time without power.
It was not the easiest of nights but as I said it was only 6 hours. We just hunkered down and did the best we could, putting our youngest children to bed early (or at least attempting to do so before the dark started to scare them, my five-month-old decided he didn't think sleeping outside of his own bedroom was a good idea so he naturally stayed up until the electric came on and he could be in his own room). Our dinner of spaghetti, which was only half cooked when the lights went off, turned into peanut butter and jelly, applesauce, and chips by flashlight. We attempted a big family game of hide-and-seek but as it turns out the only people in our home at that time were terrified of a hider jumping out and scaring the seeker. All except for my husband and toddler so only one round of that stood. The rest of the time was spent realizing how much we used the power. I suggested we start a game where every time one of us walks into a room and tries to turn on the light, we must put a dollar in a jar.
Around 11:15 pm, I was laying in bed with my baby, and as he was cooing at me and grabbing his little feet, our lights came back on. The excitement of the electricity coming on after the realization that it could be days without it is such a happy surprise! Just about 15 minutes before this, my husband and I had agreed we were probably not going to have power that night and were already making plans to go to a friend's house the next to charge things at the least. So as our lights came back on, I grabbed up my baby to start singing and dancing. My husband was downstairs on our back patio and heard someone yell from the neighborhood across the way "Woohoo! We have power!"
Isn't it funny how everyone essentially reacts the same to the electricity coming on after it's been off? Somehow as I think about that unified response, I believe that must be what it will be like when Jesus returns for His bride. Fellow believers in unified joy and indescribable relief will dance and sing and shout.
I'm so grateful these storms are over and God put His protection around my family and our home and neighborhood. In these situations, I'm reminded how little control I have and how much I don't just need to rely on God but how I have to rely on Him in order to survive. It's honestly a very peace-giving realization.
Thank you for reading.
Until next time.
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